Part 2 of My Journey to Kentucky

May 18, 2010:  So I had just had a Miraculous experience with the Oklahoma State Trooper and I was on my way continuing my 'hermitage' to Kentucky.  It is almost unbelievable that I could be having so much fun just driving by 'myself'!  :)  In the past, I was so focused on getting to the destination that getting there felt like such a chore and something I wished I could skip by just saying 'Beam me up (or there), Scotty!'  :)  Now I cherish the present moment and the Miracles I have been blessed to experience!  :)

The next Miracle came in the form of a diversion just outside of El Reno, OK.  During my trip I had seen many billboards for tourist stops to purchase Native American jewelry, crafts, etc.  I had just spent the last few months letting go of my attachment to material things until I was left with what fit in two backpacks in my car.  As a result, I didn't have much interest in succumbing to the egoic desire to buy more stuff!  :)  Yet, as I was just outside of El Reno I was drawn to the billboard for the Cherokee Trading Post.  There were several billboards for this location but the one that caught my attention was for authentic Native American flutes.

I had the urge to buy a flute like this several times in the past couple of years.  In hindsight, I realize that those urges were more about trying to buy stuff to fill the void that I have as a result of thinking that I have lost God's Love.  This experience was quite different and, in fact, the ego tried to talk me out of stopping as soon as I was Guided to stop.  Egoic thoughts occurred like "Another needless stop? You're losing time!" or "You just got rid of almost everything and now you want to start accumulating again?"  Once again, the ego tried to use it's own undoing to it's advantage!  After all, the ego was responsible for the massive accumulation in the first place and now it wanted to act like it was against having material things!  Not to be misled, I decided that I was feeling Guided to stop for a reason even if I didn't end up purchasing a flute.

It turned out that this would be one of the most pleasant buying experiences ever!  :)  I walked into the Cherokee Trading Post and was Guided right to the display of beautiful flutes.  There was no one behind the counter so I had time to be aware of the ego still trying to persuade me to leave without a flute.  Thoughts like "Well, no one came to help so it must not be meant for you to get a flute!" or even better "Well, look at how wrong you were...you must not really know True Guidance!"  :)  Once again, rather than give in to the ego I decided that I would look at the rest of the store and take my time instead of pressuring myself to get 'back on the road' right away!  :)

I took my time looking at all of the beautiful items being sold and made my way back to the display of flutes.  It was then that I realized I was being drawn to a particular flute.  This was not the most ornate flute on display and, consequently, was not the most expensive flute.  This was another moment where the ego tried to assert control.  In the past, whenever I bought something or started a new hobby I would always go for 'the best', i.e. the most expensive.  I see now that by doing this it was just an attempt by the ego to fill the perceived void of Love by thinking that 'the best' material possession was a suitable substitute.  As I was having these thoughts and accepting that I did not need the most expensive flute, I was greeted by a gentleman behind the counter.

Paul asked me if I had ever played the flute and I replied 'no'.  He asked if I would like to and I emphatically said 'yes'.  He said that he could have me playing the flute in two minutes and was very calm and confident in this statement.  In actuality, it was probably closer to five minutes but I'll let him and the Holy Spirit slide on that one!  ;)  After all, Forgiveness is the key to Salvation, right?  :)  The first thing Paul did was ask me to close my eyes and listen to him play two different flutes.  I liked the first one better than the second and he informed me that it was tuned to the key of 'G'.

I loved that he was using such an intuitive process rather than a logical/rational (i.e. egoic) way to select the appropriate flute.  Next he asked if I felt as though I would like a 5-hole or 6-hole flute and I felt Guided towards six holes.  He then went through the process of actually showing me how to hold the flute as well as how to breathe/exhale rather than blow!  I loved that I was going to get the opportunity to be even more aware of my breathing and resistance while learning to play such a beautiful sounding instrument!  After all, most of my life I have spent holding my breath instead of breathing deeply and easily!  :)  Also, any time he asked me to try the next technique he asked me to close my eyes which was very comforting.  Once again, this was a great way to disengage the ego by not relying on the false perception of sight using the physical eyes!  :)

Once Paul had shown me all of the basic techniques, he showed me the flutes he had available in the key of 'G'.  As it turns out, he only had two flutes in that key and one of them was the one I had been drawn to the whole time!  The other one was the most expensive flute he had for sale and I didn't feel the need to ignore the Guidance I had received by going for 'the best'! :)  Paul then pulled out four of the same flute and held up each one rotating them so that I could see them in their entirety.  He asked which one I felt drawn to and it turned out to be the one on the wall that I had been looking at the whole time!  I had such a wonderful experience just listening to the Guidance and not allowing the ego to control the experience!  :)  I thanked Paul for everything and after a leisurely meal at the restaurant was on my way again.

The rest of the journey to Kentucky was just as wonderful and before I knew it I had arrived in Williamstown at the perfect time!  :)  The retreat was a wonderful experience getting to meet so many wonderful people and really opening up even further exposing thoughts that I would have kept private in the past!  :)  My Faith and Willingness to Trust were being reinforced every day by the Miracles that I was experiencing and made everything so much easier than listening to the ego!  :)  This was no more evident than the absence of fear and resistance when considering the uncertainty of where I was going after the retreat was finished!  :)

Up until that weekend, every time I was set to leave one place I would experience fear and resistance because I was leaving it all of to the Holy Spirit.  That weekend though I would wake each day and say something like 'Holy Spirit, I ask for your Guidance throughout the day so that I may fulfill my part in God's plan for Salvation.  I also ask for Guidance in where I will be going after the retreat.'  During the first day of the retreat, Lauren sat down next to me and said that I was welcome to come stay with her in Georgia after the weekend!  I was ecstatic that she was open to the Guidance she received and was Willing to be so generous!  :)  I told her that I appreciated the offer but that I wanted to pray on it so that I was very clear that I was being Guided there and not just jumping at the invitation to allay any fear of uncertainty.  She was very understanding and it was a Miraculous encounter.

That night I asked the Holy Spirit for Guidance as to whether I should go to GA with Lauren.  The next morning, I asked the same thing and I still was not clear so I did not make a decision.  I had no way of knowing what was to happen later in the day!  :)  As the Holy Spirit would have it, Susan sat down with me and said she was Guided to offer to let me stay with her just outside of Cincinnati!  As grateful as I was to have yet another generous invitation, I was just as confused because now I was even less clear as to the Guidance of where I should go.  As with Lauren, I told Susan how much I appreciated the offer but that I needed to pray until I had clear Guidance.  In hindsight, there was a sign that I had not clearly seen when Kirsten asked me Saturday evening if I was going to Susan's.  This was weird because Kirsten was not there when Susan invited me and I was confused how she even knew that I was considering that possibility.  That night, I prayed once again with appreciation for the invitations and that I was hoping for clear Guidance as to where I should go.

Sunday morning I was even more grateful and confused as Chris offered to let me come stay with her in Cincinnati!  Here I was asking for Guidance and hoping for just one blessing and I received three instead!  :)  This compounded my appreciation but also my confusion yet again!  As with Lauren and Susan, I thanked Chris and said that I would pray to see where I was Guided.  I thanked the Holy Spirit and asked for clear Guidance when I received it a short while later.  I was sitting on the couch and Kerri asked me what time I was going to Susan's!  It couldn't get any clearer than that especially when I remember what Kirsten had said the day before!  :)  At that point, I once again thanked Lauren and Chris and told them that I felt Guided to stay with Susan.

The past ten days I have spent with Susan in Bellevue, KY just across the river from Cincinnati.  I got to see Chris again when I accompanied Susan to their ACIM study group.  I thought that I might actually go from Susan's to Chris' for a short stay before my trip to Utah, but the Holy Spirit has Guided me to travel to Georgia to see Lauren.  Lauren has generously offered to let me leave my ailing car at her place and drive her vehicle to UT for the retreat!  :)  I could go on and on with so many examples of the Miracles that I have been blessed to experience!  The best way to sum it all up is that the more I am willing to Trust the Holy Spirit and the more that I give, the more I have received.  In fact, I have received more than the ego could ever have imagined!  :)

Click here for pics of the Cherokee Trading Post

Love, Mimzy

Trust & Willingness Result in Peace & Joy!

May 12, 2010:  It feels like it has been FOREVER since I updated my blog rather than a couple of weeks!  :)  Sometimes I think it would be nice to have a camcorder rolling constantly because Miracles happen many times each day!  I wish that I could bottle up the Peace and Joy that I have been experiencing and somehow post it here for everyone to download.  :)  Instead, I will let the Holy Spirit Guide my writings and Trust that this blog is serving the purpose intended by the Holy Spirit.

The last blog entry I wrote was when I was still in California visiting my mom.  I knew my next destination was Williamstown, KY yet even with this amount of certainty I was still experiencing resistance in the last few days before I departed.  As with my previous departures, I did not let this resistance derail me and instead relied on my ever-present Guide to restore Peace of Mind.  In fact, I was thinking that I would leave late morning on Sunday the 2nd, but things happened that resulted in my leaving after dinner instead.  In the past, I would have caused myself serious anxiety by feeling as though I was behind schedule or slacking or trying to do too much.  In this case, I was able to remain calm and KNOW that everything would be taken care of and that I would leave exactly when I needed to leave.  That alone was enough to continue my Faith that I was on the right path but I could not predict what great things were in store!  :)

Since I left later than I thought I would, I only made it just across the Cali border into Arizona before I was ready to stop for the night.  Where and when I would stop was a decision that would play out similarly over the next couple of days until I reached KY.  The ego wanted me to decide ahead of time where to stop and then keep pushing further than that to make 'better time'.  Talk about a self-defeating frame of mind!  I mean it's bad enough that it wants to decide the future and what will be best for me, but then even that is never good enough!  Fortunately, as part of the process of awakening I have been more vigilant in being aware of my thoughts and then examining them to look at the motives.  If I am not Calm, Peaceful, and Joyful then I can be certain that the ego is trying to run the show.  Each time I started to feel uneasiness about whether I would find a 'safe' spot or make it 'far enough', I would remind myself that the Holy Spirit is always with me and will provide exactly what I need.  I found out that night that a chain of travel stops called Love's was to become my home.  I couldn't have picked a better name myself!  :)  So my first night was spent in Kingman, AZ sleeping in my car at Love's.  :)

I awoke the next morning without an alarm and that was a great feeling!  I actually got up before the sun had risen and didn't realize that this was a blessing because of what was to unfold during the day.  It was already May 3rd and I had hoped to reach my destination by the afternoon of the 5th, but I had only traveled 300 miles of my 2200 mile journey!  Not exactly a pleasing thought to the ego but fortunately I had not 'analyzed' it in that way.  :)

I remembered my mom mentioning a story about her trip to the Grand Canyon and I thought as long as I was so close to such a unique place that I should stop and enjoy the scenery instead of just keeping my blinders on and focusing on time and distance traveled.  This, of course, sent the ego into overdrive with thoughts of why I shouldn't stop like: "That's about 3 hours round trip out of the way and that's if I just drive by and wave!" or "So what...it's a canyon!  Who cares?  Besides it's all an illusion anyway, right?"  I just love that last one because the ego will use ANY thought to get what it wants even the ones it doesn't believe!  :)  Once again, I had a good laugh at the ego and decided to see the sights!  :)  Since I got up early that morning I was able to get a great parking spot before the crowds showed up.  Also, I spent two hours enjoying the view and didn't even feel in a rush to leave!  Talk about a Miracle!  :)

By the time I left, it was just before noon and I was feeling great!  Every time I needed food or gas there would be an exit with exactly what I needed when I needed it with no planning involved!  :)  I made it across Arizona and into New Mexico; however, there was one thing that managed to give rise to the ego's worries as the day went on:  The same question of where to stop for the night.  I wasn't sure if there would be a Love's in the area when I was ready to stop and figured I could always stop at a rest area.  Wouldn't you know it but ALL of the rest stops heading east in NM were closed!  I couldn't believe it.  I didn't really worry when the first one was closed because I wasn't even close to stopping.  When I passed the second one and it was closed as well I was starting to see a trend.  I figured surely the third one had to be open because otherwise what is a traveler to do?  I should have known better than to disturb my Peace of Mind with such worrisome thoughts because as the Holy Spirit would have it there was a Love's in Tucumcari, NM!  :)  'Problem' solved!  :)

The next morning I realized that I was doing just fine as far as my 'schedule' goes and that everything was working out better than I could have 'planned'.  When I stopped for breakfast and needed batteries for my MP3 player there 'just happened' to be a Target on the exit I chose.  This was great because it was cheaper than buying batteries at a gas station and I had a Target gift card as well as my discount so I could save my cash for gas!  :)  When I stopped for lunch there 'just happened' to be a bank branch on the exit I chose!  :)  Even things that would have caused me consternation in the past turned into yet another Miracle!  :)

Case in point: I was driving across Texas and I was either going the speed limit or no more than 2 mph over because I used to live there and remembered that you 'don't mess with Texas'.  I really didn't feel like getting a ticket so I was more conservative than my usual 5 mph over that I figured was a 'safe risk'.  Little did I know that Oklahoma isn't playing around when it comes to speeding and found this out first hand.  I had just crossed over the OK state line and saw that it was a 70 mph so I decided 70-74 mph was pretty safe.  Even though I saw the trooper camped in the median, I didn't see the sign below the speed limit sign that said 'Strictly Enforced'.  Well, I don't have cruise control and thought I was doing 70 mph when he clocked me but kept my eye on the rearview mirror just in case.  Sure enough, I start to see the squad car move and then pull out into traffic but there were several cars in between us and he didn't pull up right away.  A few seconds later, he accelerates and pulls up right behind me with his lights on, D'oh!  I pulled over and thought for sure I was getting a ticket instead of the Miracle to come!  :)

The trooper comes up to the passenger window and asks me if I know why he stopped me.  I said no and he said he clocked me doing 74 mph in a 70.  He said that it is a straight shot through OK and they have zero tolerance and enforce it to keep speeds in check.  I'm thinking that next comes the ticket and the big bite out of my wallet.  Instead he said he was going to issue me a warning but that he needed me to sit in the front passenger seat of the squad car.  I was ecstatic but that wasn't even what I consider the Miracle.  It's been quite a few years since I've had a ticket but I never like being pulled over much less sitting in a squad car.  In the past, I would have said as little as possible and been very anxious to get on my way.  Instead, I found myself very calm and engaging in the conversation that he was initiating.  He asked things like where I was from, the year of my vehicle, and basic information that he already knew from my license and registration.  Next, he started to talk about sports like hockey since his son played and I mentioned that my brother-in-law played for the University of Minnesota and some semi-pro as well.  Then he asked me where I was headed and that was when the Miracle started to unfold.

I said I was on my way to Kentucky for a retreat and of course his next question was what kind of retreat.  I told him that I was studying A Course In Miracles (ACIM) and that the retreat was centered around these teachings.  He had never heard of ACIM and asked me to explain.  Now, keep in mind that I had only left Minnesota about 5 weeks ago and at that time I still wasn't too comfortable talking to 'strangers' about this very different perspective on life.  But in what could only be described as a surreal moment, I said that ACIM was essentially a text discussing God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and basically life's purpose.  He asked me if it was based on Christianity and I said that it uses some of the ideas in the gospels but that they are interpreted in a very different way.  First of all, the Course says that we are already at Home with God in Heaven.  He asked "right now?" and without hesitation I said yes!  I continued to say that Jesus was not regarded as the only Son of God and that we could attain the same things as him with practice!  I went even further to say that the focus is not really on the crucifixion but the resurrection as a means to demonstrate the point we are already in Heaven!  I couldn't believe these words were coming out of my mouth!  For a split second, I did have an egoic thought that "Is Oklahoma in the bible belt and could he throw me in jail for saying these things?!"  That was just a fleeting thought and I knew that it didn't matter and I had to speak the Truth as I believed it and 'walk the walk'!  :)  By the time I knew it I had just had a spiritual discussion with an officer of the law and he was still letting me go with just a warning!  If that's not a Miracle, I don't know what is!  :)

To be continued...

Click Here for Grand Canyon Pics

Love, Mimzy