Change is a pillar of the foundation of fear. If there is one characteristic about this world of illusion, it is that nothing is eternal. It's funny because this is actually well disguised by the deceptive thoughts of the ego. I have fallen into the trap many times of thinking that happiness/joy comes from getting to know/learn something about the world of form. In fact, in a recent post the thought was expressed that knowing the rules of the world could provide some safety because then guilt could be avoided by not breaking the rules!
Where does safety really come from? What is the source of Joy/Happiness? How can Trust rest on anything that is not constant and instead changes? These questions when asked earnestly can point to the veil of the illusion of separation! If I really were a separate body living in a world built on change, then fear would indeed be natural. Safety would need to come from protecting my (s)elf from others. But what if this were not True?
What if 'I' never left my source of eternal unchanging Love? Then there would be no 'I' that could provide or even need safety! There would be no justification or need of fear! 'Life' could be an experience of the beautiful lyric in "Across the Universe" by The Beatles: Nothing's gonna change my world! It has been beautiful to experience this lately with increasing frequency of present moments.
One of the many examples of this has been with the backdrop of art. This particular form has been a breeding ground for the justification of fear and guilt by the deceptive thoughts of the ego. It has been very liberating to question the thoughts and see them as false. Now that the decision and Willingness to question has been made, the deceptive thoughts of separation require a change in form to attempt to induce further fear and guilt.
This was very clear the other day as I was very excited to take some time and play with drawings. I was having a great time singing along to The Beatles and letting the pencil move across the paper. It was so cool to just be without giving in to the thoughts that anything should be different or that anything was wrong! I was just finishing cutting out the drawings when Leila walked in with a set of 50 oil pastel sticks.
All I had been using to that point was a single violet colored pencil. The first reaction to seeing all the colors was great excitement, but as soon as the form seemed to change it was an open door by the ego to be fearful again. The intensity of the excitement was matched by the intensity of the fear. The same initial thoughts that had been believed about art to feel guilt had now come back to the mind.
Thoughts like: "There's no way I'll know what to do with all those colors.", "At least I had an excuse for the crude drawings when there was only one color.", "Now (I'm) going to have to come up with something more than simple shapes.", etc. Fortunately the joyful experiences of choosing differently meant that the same could be done in this instant without having to indulge the fearful thoughts. Instead it has been very Inspiring to let images come into the mind! Nothing has yet been put on paper with the colors but here are two more drawings done in violet. :) Love, Mimzy ♥
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