Time To See How Far the Rabbit Hole Goes

April 20, 2010:  It is just past midnight as I write this and I will be leaving the monastery later in the morning.  My time here has been PRICELESS and I am so happy that I followed the Guidance of the Holy Spirit.  It's funny because the more the ego is undone the more I don't know the image of 'me' that the ego used to project! :)

Things like: 'Did I really used to get so upset about dishes not being spotless after they were cleaned?' or 'Did I really hoard things and hang onto stuff for 15-20 years?'  It's interesting because over the past year I have gone from a house to a townhouse to an apartment to a car and now I am packing all of my material things into a backpack!  The process of becoming aware of attachment and learning to release it has been cathartic as well as chaotic.  It is chaotic to the ego to think about letting go of everything that it used to define 'me' but now that I am aware of the egoic thoughts I can release them to the Holy Spirit and a new perspective takes place.  This is very freeing and feels so amazing!  :)

I am grateful to the Holy Spirit for guiding me here and gently waking me up to my True Self!  :)  I am also very grateful to Lisa, Leila, and Devan for being so open and willing to hold the Truth while I have become aware of my resistance and my process of releasing it!  :)

I know that the ego still tries to maintain control but I feel that I now have the tools to continue to undo it and I always have the Holy Spirit to guide me!  :)  My experiences here as well as leading up to coming here have given me the confidence to continue to Trust the Holy Spirit and I know that my journey will get even better.  I have about two weeks before I make it to Kentucky for my retreat with David and the others.   I am excited about not having to rush or feel as though I must be somewhere right away.  I am also very excited (and sometimes fearful) of not having a concrete plan and the uncertainty that goes with it.  It is with Trust and willingness that I put my faith in the Holy Spirit to guide me Home!  :)

I still feel guided to use this blog and my Facebook page to journal my path even though my time at the monastery has come to a close.   I hope that EVERYONE finds the Peace and Joy that God Wills for us!  :)

Love,
Mimzy